Still Visible
by Hallon
Summary: A companion to This Crazy World, set between part 7 and 8 of that story. What really happened that morning in the diner?


**This Crazy World**

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**Summary:** A companion to _This Crazy World_, set between part 7 and 8 of that story. What really happened that morning in the diner?

**A/N:** Written because some of the events in the original fic may need some elaboration. And because I wanted to do it. Some of you who read that story have requested something like this. I hope you like what came out of it.

For Knowhere, Sandi and Selina, because the future is all your doing. :)

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Gilmore Girls. That's pretty obvious, since if I did, Jess would still be in it and no one would have been abducted by aliens and changed personality.

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**Interlude 1. ****Still Visible**

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Jess stood behind the counter, just like he used to when business was slow, with a book in front of him and his head propped up with a hand, arms resting on the counter. Once in a while he glanced up from the book to check on the customers.

Luke had left, with plenty of time to get to Lorelai's long before she would be ready, and Jess had waved him off with a smirk and shook his head. The steady trail of customers had picked up shortly after Luke left and it had been a rather busy morning until just minutes ago. Now it was strangely calm again and Jess was hunched over the counter, reading and trying to ignore the questioning glances from the more nosy customers.

After he had evaded Miss Patty's questions for the third time they had gotten the message and now they limited their curiosity to glances and quiet talk among themselves. A couple times he had caught parts of their whispered conversations and rolled his eyes at their theories.

The bell jingled again, but he was in the middle of a favorite passage, so he didn't look up right away. Not until he noticed how quiet the diner had become.

He frowned and looked up from his book, wondering what was going on, and found himself looking right at Rory. She was standing just inside the door, a slightly bewildered expression on her face and her hand still on the doorknob.

The air in the diner suddenly tingled with anticipation, everyone waiting for what would happen, holding their breath, awaiting the ignition of an explosion bound to happen.

Jess slowly marked his page in the book and set it aside, watching Rory fiddle with her purse. He could feel his jaw clench, almost by its own, and then he straightened out.

"Hey," he said, his voice neutral.

The whole diner exhaled with that word, feeling the most eminent danger dissolve around them and Jess once again rolled his eyes at them, a slightly annoyed scowl on his face.

"Um, hi," Rory said back, sounding a bit uncertain, but even so detached herself from the door and walked up to the counter. "I didn't know you were gonna be here."

"Huh," Jess said, raising an eyebrow.

"I…didn't mean it like that," she hurriedly corrected herself with a grimace, inwardly scolding herself for letting that slip out. "I just…"

Jess shrugged, not wanting to hear her excuse. "Can I get you anything?"

"Oh," Rory said quietly with a sad sigh and looked down. "Coffee, thanks."

"Ok." Jess nodded and turned away, grabbing the coffee pot. "For here or to go?" he asked, his back still turned.

Rory snapped her head up at his question. "Um…" she mumbled, fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. "Here," she finally settled on, trying to make herself sound certain.

Jess nodded again and pulled out a mug, filled it with coffee and set it down in front of her. "There you are."

"Thank you," Rory said quietly and picked up the mug.

"Sure," Jess said and put the pot back just as the bell chimed again.

In the corner of his eye he saw a woman walk up to the counter and he headed over to meet her. "What can I get you?" he asked.

"An omelet. With bacon on the side," the woman said, taking a seat.

"You hear that," Jess called out in the kitchen and got an affirmative grunt in response. "Coming up," he said, turning back to the customer. "Anything to drink?"

"Just coffee," she said with a smile.

"Ok," he said, poured her a mug and set it down in front of her. "That all?"

"Yes, thank you."

"Welcome," Jess nodded with a smile and once again returned the coffee pot to the heater.

A few seats down the counter Rory was sitting on her stool, watching the scene with a frown on her face. It didn't go unnoticed by her how different he acted away from her, or how he stiffened just a little when he turned around and found her looking at him.

She quickly looked down, hiding behind her coffee mug, but could still see him slowly walking back over to her. Searching for something to say she quickly let her eyes scan the counter in front of her until they settled on a book she hadn't noticed before.

"Joseph O'Connor?" she asked, reading from the cover.

"Huh." He stared at her, not expecting her to say anything, and then followed her gaze to his book. "Right."

"I haven't read anything by him," she said, feeling a bit more comfortable with a known subject, even though the awkwardness of the situation was still painfully obvious.

"You should," Jess said, leaning back against the counter by the wall. "He's good."

Rory set down her coffee mug and glanced up at him. Then she returned her gaze to the book. "Can I look?" she asked, almost hopefully.

"Sure," Jess shrugged and relaxed against the counter, breathing out now that her concentration turned completely to the book.

He wasn't completely sure why her presence made him this tense, but whatever the reason was he didn't like it. It could be just leftover anger and bitterness from their last meeting, though he thought there was probably something else too. He even had a gnawing suspicion of what it was, but he wasn't about to acknowledge it.

Instead he made himself busy by starting a new round of coffee.

Rory picked the book up carefully and quickly scanned the cover to get a feel for it before opening it and reading the first couple of sentences. After flipping through about half the book, past the dog-eared page that most likely marked how far Jess had gotten, she stopped on a random page and her eyes caught an underlined passage. _'You just haven't the guts to walk out,' she said, 'that's your problem.'_ And above it, in the same handwriting that could be seen on almost every page of the book, was written, _'cause walking out is so much better?'_

She stared at the words for a moment, the bitterness of them almost making her physically flinch. They had been erased, but the words were printed too hard into the paper for them to have disappeared completely, leaving a faint mark behind.

What did it mean, she wondered. He had erased them, even though some time before that they had been important enough for him to write down. But what did it mean that he had erased them in the first place? Or had he left those last marks there because he changed his mind?

And walking out on what? Was he thinking of her when he wrote it? She had no idea how old the words were. The tiny scribbles that marked the pages looked like they had been made on at least three different occasions. And there was no way of knowing when this particular line had been added. Or erased for that matter.

And now she was seriously overanalyzing this in her head, she told herself and quickly changed the page, hoping he hadn't noticed her interest in that particular part of the book. She flipped through the rest of it quickly, no longer paying attention to what she was doing and then closed it, putting it back on the counter.

"Interesting enough?" she heard him ask, his words making her freeze in place. She didn't dare look up, not wanting him to read any of the conflicting feelings she was sure were clearly visible on her face.

"Yeah, it looks good," she managed. She grabbed her coffee again and took a big gulp of it, wanting something to do. It was getting cold, but she didn't care right now.

"It's been a couple years since I read it last," Jess said, wondering briefly why she looked so much more uncomfortable all of a sudden, but shrugged it off. What did he know about what she did or thought now anyway?

Rory swallowed the last of her coffee, setting the mug down carefully in front of her. A couple years. That could mean two. Or three. "Oh," she said quietly, her mind working too hard to make sense of it. "Then it's time to read it again."

"Yeah, I thought so," Jess agreed and leaned back against the back counter again, the heat from the coffee maker warming his back.

"I should get going," Rory suddenly announced, quickly scurrying off her stool, picking up her purse from the counter and searching through it for some change.

"Ok," Jess said slowly, frowning slightly and pushed himself off the counter.

"Yeah, I can't leave Paul Anka home alone," Rory quickly explained, grasping the first excuse she could think of, glad that it actually sounded at least partly plausible, even if that part was very small.

"Right, the dog," Jess nodded, deciding to let her obvious excuse slide. He wasn't sure he wanted the truth and he definitely didn't want to cause a scene in the middle of the diner.

He saw her pull out enough money from her purse to cover at least four cups of coffee and then she looked up at him briefly and darted for the door. He watched her for a second until he could see a customer in the corner getting ready to leave. With a last glance at her as she hurried over the street he started for the table, wondering what had just happened.

He could feel eyes on him, following his movements, but he ignored them, accepted the money from the customer and nodded a goodbye before gathering up the dishes and walking out in the kitchen with them.

He let out a breath once he was out of sight, leaning back against a wall and dragging a hand down his face. Then he shook his head and took a deep breath, walking out in the diner again, resuming his former position at the counter, leaning over his book.

He wasn't in the mood for analyzing the last couple of minutes. He would much rather follow Eddie Virago on his more or less disastrous journey to London. At least he could focus on someone else's problems.


End file.
